Is it wrong to be frustrated with Lydia right now? Somehow I'm frustrated with her because she's crying her eyes out for her bird who died - but she makes me want to cry at my screwed up life. Gesh. Its not that I'm not sad her bird died - its just frustrating that she can let herself cry and I can't. Why is this?

novelling music

so far my favorite songs (in order of favoritism) are :

Lady in Spain - Ingrid Michaelson
You and I - Ingrid Michaelson
Birds - Kate Nash
Skeleton Song - Kate Nash
Better - Regina Spektor

That's pretty much all i'm listening too. ha.

goodbye little black box

well my laptop (i say my laptop with a dirty look at whoever's typing on it at the moment) has been given away to someone at the office to travel with. but of course lydia with her *brilliant* desktop won't let me type on hers so i'm probably going to go type where everyone can see what i'm doing. i hate that! gah. at least mom and dad essentially won't be there especially since dad is gone until thursday. :P back just in time to tell me bye.

love, your computer deprived and seriously irritated about it, friend.

p.s. this computer that i might get to use is in the copy room. THE FREAKING COPY ROOM!

one day i'm gonna

when i grow up, i wanna be a writer. i want to spend my days typing away in the corner of a house which will be decorated just the way i want it to with a part time job that will give me ideas, for instance, serving coffee. i will not live by myself and will live with people who in fact will have beds large enough for me to sneak into at night and snuggle with. i will write words every day and send drafts to publishers. i will have stacks of books to read. and i will play the na no game every year. and use my drafts. and i will have a dog and a cat. and perhaps a tank of fish. and while i'm at it, i believe i'll purchase a bengal tiger.

love y'all.

swimming advice please

i want to quit swimming. i know how to swim and now i'm on endurance. thank you, but i'll pass. i'm not swimming in competitions. i get sick from everything i'm doing. i won't just quit. i'm going to take up running 5ks with my family. i'm still in tae kwon do. i've gotten what i can from swimming now it makes me ache to think about it. i'm still sore from friday! thats not good. it makes me cry. i don't want to see that many boys in speedos, as a post thought. advice, please?